Sex

Jokes Categories : Sex
-{ 97 year old man comes to his doctor looking depressed...	-{ A 54 year old accountant leaves a letter for his wife...
-{ A 70-year-old man has never been married...	-{ A beautiful, voluptuous woman went to a gynecologist...
-{ A blind guy goes into a whore house...	-{ A boat load filled with Viagra sank in Baltimore Harbor...
-{ A clever court case	-{ A college couple is under a tree on campus making out...
-{ A cop sees a car weaving all over the road and pulls it over...	-{ A couple on their honeymoon woke up after their big night...
-{ A cure for a headache	-{ A doctor's advice to young bride regarding the use of the diaphragm
-{ A fair price	-{ A farmer had 3 beautiful daughters who were...
-{ A fellow picked up a girl in a bar and took her home with him...	-{ A few questions and answers
-{ A Frenchman was arrested and charged with having sex...	-{ A furrier from the US goes to Helsinki...
-{ A girl gets a tatoo of Santa Claus on one...	-{ A Girl Scout troop leader...
-{ A group of cowboys were branding some cattle...	-{ A Guide to Love and Sex for Virgins
-{ A guy approaches a prostitute on the street and asks her...	-{ A guy meets a girl out at a nightclub and she invites him back...
-{ A guy rings work and says...	-{ A guy steps into an elevator and...
-{ A guy walks into a bar and sits down next to...	-{ A guy walks into an elevator and stands next...
-{ A guy was sitting in a bar when a stranger...	-{ A guy's fingering his girlfriend...
-{ A horny young man went to a brothel...	-{ A huge guy marries a tiny girl, and at the wedding...
-{ A husband and wife were out playing golf...	-{ A husky foreigner, looking for sex...
-{ A lady goes in to take a tennis lesson...	-{ A little girl goes into the toilet and sees her dad having a shower...
-{ A Long Chocolate Fallus Story	-{ A long-haired youth was hitchhiking through the deep South...
-{ A man and a woman are sitting next to each other...	-{ A man comes to a doctor and...
-{ A man finds himself staying in a Vegas hotel room...	-{ A man goes to the doctor with a long history of...
-{ A man is driving down the freeway...	-{ A man leaned toward an attractive woman at a bar...
-{ A man takes his 10 year old daughter to the doctor...	-{ A man walks into a pharmacy, buys a condom...
-{ A man wonders if having sex on the Sabbath is a sin...	-{ A man, being on top of a woman...
-{ A middle-aged guy and his date are making out hot and heavy...	-{ A mother-daughter conversation
-{ A naive young girl goes into the doctors office.	-{ A new contraceptive
-{ A new way to loose weight	-{ A novel idea
-{ A nun is walking down a deserted road when...	-{ A penis study
-{ A policeman was patrolling near midnight...	-{ A priest is teaching a nun how to swim...
-{ A proper name	-{ A prostitute goes to the hospital to visit a colleague...
-{ A question for Bill Clinton	-{ A Scottish private walks into the pharmacy...
-{ A small boy walks into his mothers room...	-{ A small dissapointment
-{ A tall woman met a midget at a party...	-{ A tourist from Albegestan goes on his first overseas trip...
-{ A truck driver breaks down and...	-{ A vicious circle
-{ A woman walks into her accountant's office and...	-{ A wonderful exercise
-{ A young girl had not been feeling well...	-{ A young girl is speaking with her father...
-{ A young kid's in a shipwreck and he winds up stranded...	-{ A young lady had just visited her doctor...
-{ A young man took a girl out to dinner and a show...	-{ A young married couple has difficulties conceiving a baby...
-{ After spending a night at a hotel with a prostitute...	-{ After their love-making session the young bride asks her husband...
-{ Alcohol as a substitute for a woman	-{ Almost celibate
-{ An aging hooker volunteered to give the novice...	-{ An army private went to see the Medical Captain for a new...
-{ An elderly man goes into a brothel...	-{ An old man of 70 married a young girl of 18...
-{ An old sailor goes to a brothel...	-{ Anomaly or...
-{ Appropriate punishment	-{ At the ripe old age of 77, grandpa had decided to marry...
-{ Back in the good ole days in Texas...	-{ Best kind of sex
-{ Biology Class	-{ Bra sizes
-{ Charlie was in a bar and three babes came up and...	-{ Confessions
-{ Course of action	-{ Darling, she whispered after they had finished making love...
-{ Definition of bad lover	-{ Did you hear about the call girl who accidentally...
-{ Did you hear about the flasher who was thinking of retiring?	-{ Did you hear about the guy who died of Viagra overdose?
-{ Did you hear about the hooker that had her appendix taken out?	-{ Did you hear about the new course you can take at school?
-{ Did you hear about the woman who only had two chances to get pregnant?	-{ Did you know Sex is a crime?
-{ Did you know that the night Santa first met his future wife...	-{ Did you know there are serial number on condoms?
-{ Different sex outcomes	-{ Do you know the difference in sugar and Sweet-n-Low?
-{ Do you know what a Yankee is?	-{ Do you know why it's called sex?
-{ Do you smoke after sex?	-{ Down in Florida, two widows were talking and one asked...
-{ During her annual checkup, the well-constructed miss...	-{ Ed, Ted and their wives went out camping one weekend...
-{ Elderly romance	-{ Every precaution
-{ Excuse TO smoke	-{ Five fingers
-{ Flavoured condoms	-{ For me, penises are a hobby...
-{ Forgot to pedal	-{ Fortunate ingenuity
-{ Get some of this	-{ Ghost sex
-{ Golf in the Bedroom	-{ Grandma Saperstein and Grandpa Rabinowitz are sitting...
-{ Grandpa and Little Johnny are sitting...	-{ Great A Hot & Juicy Story
-{ Happens all the time	-{ Have you heard about the new Mechanical Whore?
-{ Have you heard about the new orgasm pill?	-{ Heated passions
-{ Her senses swam. She was overcome with an aching desire...	-{ Household items
-{ How can a man tell when his sperm count is elevated?	-{ How can ya tell when a woman has fucked too much?
-{ How can you tell if your date really digs oral sex?	-{ How can you tell if your girlfriend is frigid?
-{ How can you tell when your girlfriend is horny?	-{ How come Mike Tysons eyes always water during sex?
-{ How did the Burger King get the Dairy Queen pregnant?	-{ How do you clean a condom?
-{ How do you get Visual Aids?	-{ How do you know when you have a serious overbite?
-{ How do you know when you've satisfied a redhead?	-{ How do you know when your girlfriend is on anabolic steroids?
-{ How do you know when your girlfriend is too fat?	-{ How do you know you're leading a sad life?
-{ How do you make love to a fat girl?	-{ How do you piss your girlfriend of when your having sex?
-{ How do you re-sleeve a prostitue?	-{ How does a women hold her liquor?
-{ How does a yuppie couple perform doggie-style sex?	-{ How does Herpes leave the hospital?
-{ How is pubic hair like parsley?	-{ How is sex like air?
-{ How long does it take for a woman to orgasm?	-{ Husband: Want a quickie?
-{ I read last week...	-{ I tried phone sex once...
-{ If a light sleeper sleeps lighter with...	-{ If the bird of wisdom is an owl, and the bird of peace...
-{ In jail...	-{ In the Sex Ed class the teacher says...
-{ It has been determined that having sex before...	-{ It just kills my appetite
-{ It seems that Ken Starr is dropping all sexual allegations...	-{ It was a somber day in Disney land...
-{ It was laying limp in my hand...	-{ Jake is 85, and he gets married to a 16-year-old.
-{ Jerry Falwell was seated next to President Clinton...	-{ John pulled over the car by the side of the road...
-{ Kiss me...yeah!	-{ Know the difference
-{ Lightbulbs for dinner	-{ Little Johnny was 7 years old, and like other boys his age...
-{ Little Red Riding Hood was walking through the woods...	-{ Love handles
-{ Man who goes to sleep with sex...	-{ Mary went to Jill's place to tell her about a horrible...
-{ Mick was sitting at the pub telling his mate Harry...	-{ Mommy, mommy! What's a nymphomaniac?
-{ Mrs. Ogden went to her doctor and said...	-{ My girlfriend told me to give her 12 inches...
-{ Mysterious picture	-{ Nancy Reagan is the celebrity contestant on Password...
-{ Nauseous sex	-{ Nearsightedness
-{ Necking	-{ No children yet
-{ Not enough time to tell	-{ Old Chinese proverb
-{ On a very cold night...	-{ Once in a medieval times, there was a King who was getting sort of...
-{ One afternoon this young girl knocked on the door of her neighbor...	-{ One day a housewife was going about the usual business...
-{ One day a priest went into a public bathroom to use the stall...	-{ One day this old man was about to have sex with a young girl...
-{ One day, a young cowboy and a cowgirl decided...	-{ One neighbor says to the other...
-{ One night the Norse god Thor was feeling a bit horny...	-{ One night, as a couple lay down for bed...
-{ Paying Rent	-{ Play doctor
-{ Playgirl Rejection Letter	-{ Poetic justice
-{ Proffessional Terms II	-{ Recipe for Banana Bread
-{ Ring, ring!	-{ Sadie lost her husband almost four years ago and still...
-{ Safe to appear	-{ Schick is walking down the boardwalk in Atlantic City...
-{ Sexually active	-{ Sneezing orgasms
-{ So one sperm says to the other...	-{ So the elephant says to the naked man...
-{ Social Security Sex	-{ Soft and Hard
-{ Standardized Guide to the Bases	-{ Stuck orgasm
-{ Studly young Romeo and his dimwitted college sidekick...	-{ Take her apart!
-{ The aged patient doddered into...	-{ The art of foreplay
-{ The Australian way	-{ The Big Horse Race
-{ The clerk showed the man the store's most expensive perfume...	-{ The common symptoms of swine flu
-{ The dean of women at an exclusive girl's college...	-{ The definition of amnesia
-{ The doctor looked benignly at the woman who had come to him...	-{ The Engineer had just returned from a week long seminar...
-{ The guy considered himself lucky to have been able...	-{ The horny midget found that the best way...
-{ The limousine was taking the beautiful raven-haired model...	-{ The new hooker had just finished her first trick...
-{ The newly married man came home from work...	-{ The newlyweds showed up at the hotel and...
-{ The right rhythm	-{ The Seven Dwarfs
-{ The seven dwarves were in Rome...	-{ The wife of an older man is distraught...
-{ The young couple was engaged in a most affectionate...	-{ The young lady admired the watch in the store window...
-{ There is this French couple, sitting up talking, when...	-{ There once was a young Irish woman who went to confession...
-{ There was a young girl called Anna...	-{ There was a young man in the Air Force...
-{ There were 2 old-maid sisters, both virgins...	-{ There were two people having sex in a car...
-{ These two guys are car pooling home from work one day...	-{ These two sperm were swimming around...
-{ This bloke went into a nightclub and saw a gorgeous...	-{ This guy was walking down a street in Texas and this hooker...
-{ This is horny!	-{ This man was having problems getting it up to have sex...
-{ This old lady walks out of the grocery store and goes to the bus stop...	-{ This one New Yorker married himself a southern gal...
-{ This redneck gets married, but on his wedding night...	-{ This woman has her bridge club every Thursday night...
-{ Those clothes are very becoming on you	-{ Three altar boys are standing in the snow with...
-{ Three college students were rapping about who they'd like to be...	-{ Three guys are discussing women...
-{ Three Irish women were discussing their respective mates...	-{ Three little old ladies, sitting on a park bench...
-{ Together again	-{ Twice a day
-{ Two bikers were talking at a bar...	-{ Two couples decide to spend the weekend away together...
-{ Two drunks sitting at the rural area bar, lamenting...	-{ Two dwarfs pick up two hookers and take them to their hotel rooms...
-{ Two elderly Southern women are sitting on the veranda...	-{ Two friends met after a long time, and chatted about...
-{ Two hookers were on a street corner...	-{ Two mates were screwing the same chick at the same time...
-{ Two men are discussing the age old question...	-{ Two men were talking to each other about how pussy tastes...
-{ Two old friends from the mountains ran into each other...	-{ Two pedophiles were sitting on the beach...
-{ Two prostitutes, after Christmas holidays...	-{ Two storks on a nest, a father stork and baby stork...
-{ Two young brothers, aged 5 and 6...	-{ Two young girls were talking about their sex lives...
-{ Want some of this?	-{ What am I?
-{ What did cinderella do when she got to the ball?	-{ What did the boy with a long tongue and big lips say to his mom...
-{ What do jello and a woman have in common?	-{ What do people do for fun on Halloween?
-{ What do Viagra And Disney Land have in common?	-{ What do you call a prostitute with a runny nose?
-{ What do you call a prostitute with her hand down her skirt?	-{ What do you call a woman who can suck golf balls through a hose?
-{ What do you call foreplay in Alabama?	-{ What do you call someone who fucks kids in the ass?
-{ What do you do after you just raped a 12yr old deaf & dumb girl ?	-{ What do you do in case of fallout?
-{ What do you do when you are finished fucking a ten-year old girl?	-{ What do you get if you cross your missus with a pit bull?
-{ What do you get when you cross a rooster and a telephone pole?	-{ What does a camera and a condom have in common?
-{ What does pizza delivery man and a gynaecologist...	-{ What goes in dry, comes out wet, and gives warm satisfaction?
-{ What happened to the cheerleader when she did the splits?	-{ What is 18 inches long and makes women scream all night ?
-{ What is 3 feet tall and gives me head?	-{ What is a man's idea of protected sex?
-{ What is a yankee?	-{ What is another term for cunnilingus?
-{ What is green and eats nuts?	-{ What is green and smells like pig?
-{ What is pink and moist and split in the middle?	-{ What is red and has seven dents?
-{ What is the Australian for foreplay?	-{ What is the best thing about a blow job?
-{ What is the definition of a virgin?	-{ What is the definition of an overbite?
-{ What is the difference between "ooh" and "aah?"	-{ What is the difference between a Certificate of Deposit and Intercourse?
-{ What is the difference between a golf ball and a g-spot?	-{ What is the difference between a Slut and a Bitch?
-{ What is the difference between a transvestite sailor and...	-{ What is the difference between Bill Clinton, and the Titanic?
-{ What is the difference between condoms and coffins?	-{ What is the difference between erotic and kinky?
-{ What is the difference between hard and light?	-{ What is the difference between mayonaise and sperm?
-{ What is the difference between white onions, brown onions...	-{ What is the most insensitive part of a penis?
-{ What is the similarity between a woman and a washing machine?	-{ What is worse than a dead dog on your piano?
-{ What kind of Bees...	-{ What Not to Name Your Dog
-{ What part of a woman does a man like looking at best?	-{ What the difference between true love and herpes?
-{ What two things in the air will get a women pregnant?	-{ What word starts with an 'F' and ends in 'K' that means a lot of...
-{ What's a real mate?	-{ What's an Australian kiss?
-{ What's the definition of a real loser?	-{ What's the definition of the perfect woman?
-{ What's the definition of virginity?	-{ What's the difference between a Geneologist and a Gynecologist?
-{ What's the difference between Love, True Love and showing off?	-{ What's the difference between mono and herpes?
-{ What's the difference between pussy and apple pie?	-{ What's the difference between white onions, brown onions...
-{ What's the most active muscle in a woman?	-{ What's the purpose of a bellybutton?
-{ What's the similarity between Bill Clinton and a carpenter?	-{ What's the worst thing about being a paedophile?
-{ Whats long, hard and full of semen?	-{ Whats the difference between a regular toad and a horney toad?
-{ When a man takes off his pants in a hotel room...	-{ When I was growing up I used to lick all...
-{ When the man first noticed that his penis was growing longer...	-{ When you go to the hospital how do you find the head nurse?
-{ Where does Peter Pan eat?	-{ Which of the following does not belong?
-{ While attending a spelling session in school one day...	-{ Who makes more money a drug dealer or a hooker?
-{ Who's got a bigger crotch?	-{ Why are women like snow flakes?
-{ Why are women so bad at mathematics?	-{ Why cannot Miss Piggy count to 70?
-{ Why do bankers make great lovers?	-{ Why do Black widow spiders kill there mates after mating?
-{ Why do they put strings on tampons?	-{ Why do they say that eating yogurt and oysters...
-{ Why do women fake orgasms?	-{ Why does Barbie never get pregnant?
-{ Why does Mary Lou Retton smile so much?	-{ Why don't women blink during foreplay?
-{ Why is 88 better than 69?	-{ Why is a joke like pussy?
-{ Why is having a wank like eating McDonald's?	-{ Why is pubic hair curly?
-{ Why is sex like money in the bank?	-{ Why is sleeping with a man like a soap opera?
-{ Why was Raggedy Ann thrown out of the toy store?	-{ Wife comes home to find the old man shagging the dog...
-{ Wrong card	-{ You can come out now
-{ ZipperGate Update...

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Jokes Categories : Sex